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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23094025">The My Hero X Spongebob Super-Absorbent Parody Collection</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Everything_Entertainment/pseuds/Everything_Entertainment'>Everything_Entertainment</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>SpongeBob SquarePants (Cartoon), 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Based on a SpongeBob SquarePants Episode, Comedy, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Gen, Parody, SpongeBob SquarePants References</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 12:34:00</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>11,163</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23094025</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Everything_Entertainment/pseuds/Everything_Entertainment</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>All of your favorite Spongebob episodes from the golden days of Nickelodeon reenacted by the cast of the Shonen Anime, My Hero Academia, are finally here on AO3! Witness the iconic underwater hi-jinks take place on dry land with your favorite heroes-in-training as they navigate U.A. Academy with yellow spongy references galore in a Cartoon/Anime parody series that you have yet to see!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Band Heroes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi! It's-a me, Everything Entertainment! This is my first time on Archive of Our Own, so I thought I could extend some of my creative thinking by posting my fan fiction on here. This first story that you are reading is a collection of my parody one-shots of My Hero Academia and Spongebob. So far it is still ongoing, but when I am in a more creative mood, I will definitely post more of the one-shot stories here as a sort of collection (as the title implied). Without further ado, please enjoy and don't forget to read and review!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Early one morning in the quiet and lonely apartment of U.A. teacher, Shota Aizawa, also known by his Pro Hero moniker, Eraser Head, was snoozing loudly in his yellow sleeping bag on the living room couch when he heard loud knocking at his front door. His eyelids slowly opened, barely exposing his bloodshot eyes. He unzipped his sleeping bag, rolled it back up, and groggily arose from his slumber. The teacher got up out of his couch and walked up to the door to respond to the constant rapping.</p><p>He answers the door and to his surprise, it was the local veterinarian who had his medical kit in hand and a few nurses beside him. "Hello, we're from the animal hospital. We heard you had a dying animal on the premises."</p><p>Aizawa rudely slammed the door on the veterinarian's face. Just when he was about to head back to sleep, his cell phone began to ring. He recognised the caller ID belonging to Hizashi Yamada, also known as Present Mic.</p><p>The Erasure hero decided to answer Mic's call. "You've reached the house of a tired pro-hero, please start after the..." Aizawa let out a loud yawn to imitate a voice message.</p><p><em>"Hi-ya, Aizawa! Sounds like you've gotta dying animal to attend to!"</em> greeted Mic over the phone in a teasing manner.</p><p>"Hizashi," muttered the tired teacher, who was annoyed but also lethargic. "Why are you calling me this early? You know better than to wake me at this hour."</p><p><em>"I thought of that, but then I thought of how excited you'll be when I tell you the news!"</em> beamed Present Mic.</p><p>Aizawa sighed, "All right, lemme hear it."</p><p>
  <em>"The U.A. student council petitioned to the principal to start a marching band and he already went ahead and approved of it!"</em>
</p><p>"Why the hell would he already approve it without having a staff meeting?" Aizawa asked.</p><p><em>"Well, I guess he just enjoys marching bands," </em>surmised Mic.<em> "And~ guess which one of the lucky classes he chose to be in the competition: Class 1-A!"</em></p><p>Eraser Head groaned and facepalmed himself as he lowered the phone away from his mouth. "God, why me... Why is it always me and my classroom full of brats?" He whispered, bringing the phone back up to his ear. "So... when's the first competition?"</p><p>Present Mic was silent on the other end for a few moments before replying. <em>"In four days."</em></p><p>A migraine suddenly inflicted Aizawa's cranium as stress became the first thing that popped into his head. The teacher began to stammer, "Fo-fo-fo... fo-fo-fo... fo-fo-fo?!"</p><p>
  <em>"THAT'S RIGHT! Unfortunately, the other classes aren't gonna be able to compete. So we were hoping you could cover for them."</em>
</p><p>"Uhh... well, I uh..." Aizawa tried to find the right excuse to tell Mic, but couldn't think of anything.</p><p><em>"What's wrong? Did something</em> <em>come up?" </em>Hizashi inquired. <em>"If so, then I may have to report to Nezu. Once you back out, then all of the funds put into the program would be wasted, and we would be forced to make budget cuts. Heck, us teachers may even lose our jobs if that happened."</em></p><p>
  <em>Aizawa was completely silent on the other end of the line. "Aizawa? Hello? Well, I guess I'll just take the dead silence as an answer then-"</em>
</p><p>As Present Mic was about to hang up, Aizawa suddenly slammed on the coffee table. "HOLD IT!" He shouted. "It just so happens that my band has rehearsed DOZENS of times, they WILL be at that competition within four days, and they are going to PLAY their asses off whether they LIKE IT OR NOT! How is THAT for an answer, Mic?!"</p><p>Present Mic was astonished by the amount of earth-shattering 'enthusiasm' from Eraser Head's tone of voice. <em>"ALL RIGHT THEN! We'll see you and your students at the competition! Get ready, though, because the other competing schools are gonna rock you SOOO hard, the audience may have to bring lots of ibuprofen!"</em></p><p>With that said, both pro-heroes hung up, ending their conversation. "If those jackasses at the school board wanna marching band so badly, they're gonna get one. But first I gotta drum up a band," Aizawa then started to chuckle. "Drum... heh-heh, band humor."</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Next Morning; U.A. Classroom 1-A</strong>
</p><p>The students of Class 1-A were situated in their homeroom as most of them shared conversations with one another while others just silently played on their phones to pass the time. A green-haired kid named Izuku Midoriya, known by his trainee hero name as Deku, noticed that it was half-past 8:00 AM and classes have already started at this point.</p><p>"Huh, I wonder where Aizawa-sensei is," Deku muttered to himself. "Usually he would already be here before us. He must be running late-"</p><p>"HEY, SHUT UP, DEKU! I CAN HEAR YOUR MUTTERING FROM OVER HERE!" shouted Katsuki Bakugo, glaring at his rival/classmate.</p><p>"Eh, sorry, Kacchan..." gulped Deku.</p><p>Just then, Aizawa wearily came in through the classroom door with flyers in hand. "Sorry, I'm late, class. I had to run down to the library to print some things off. But the librarian took forever to refill ink cartridge on the machine." The teacher mumbled, setting the messy stack of flyers down on his desk.</p><p>"Aizawa-sensei? Why do you have so many flyers?" asked Tenya Iida, the Engine quirk trainee hero. "Is it because you are willing to promote the pride and spirit that is U.A.? If that is the case, then I am willing to spread the message! For our fellow teachers and classmates!" He said loud and proudly.</p><p>"Well, then, you can start by handing out the flyers," ordered Aizawa, handing the stack to Tenya. The student dutifully passes out the flyers around from desk-to-desk as each student read the front of the flyer.</p><p>"'Looking to add fulfillment to your dull, dull life...?'" read Ochako Uraraka, the Gravity quirk trainee.</p><p>"'Then become a part of the greatest musical sensation to ever hit Tokyo...'" read Fumikage Tokoyami, the Shadow quirk trainee.</p><p>"'And be forever adored by thousands of people you don't know'...kero." read Tsuyu Asui, the Frog quirk trainee.</p><p>"'Not to mention... free refreshments.'" grinned Denki Kaminari, the Electricity quirk trainee.</p><p>"'Practice begins tonight, 8:30 sharp.'" read Mezo Shoji, the Dupli-Arm quirk trainee.</p><p>Shoto Todoroki raised his hand. "Aizawa-sensei, is this about the upcoming marching band competition?"</p><p>"Yes, Shoto," replied the Erasure hero. "In fact, we have all been nominated to participate in this contest. I made those flyers to bring some motivation. But since some of you are still thinking it over, I am going to come out and say this: I expect ALL of you to participate."</p><p>The class went silent as they realized their teacher was serious and that this competition was mandatory. Izuku raised his hand, "But... how are we supposed to form a marching band if we can't play instruments?"</p><p>"Just come back to the classroom tonight at 8:30. We'll work our way up if we have to," informed Aizawa.</p><p>Bakugo slammed his palms against his desk in anger. "THIS IS BULLCRAP! You can't expect us to be in a marching band if we can't play instruments!"</p><p>"If you don't join your class in on this assignment, I'll just have to expel you, Bakugo." warned Aizawa.</p><p>"WHAT?!" The Explosion quirk trainee shouted.</p><p>"Come on, Bakugo, we have to do this or you won't be able to become a hero!" Eijiro Kirishima, the Hardening quirk trainee, pleaded with his friend.</p><p>"Yeah, do it for the free food!" Denki said.</p><p>Bakugo scoffed as he slumped down in his desk. "Tch, whatever."</p><p>"Anyone else want to back out?" Aizawa asked condescendingly to which everyone stayed quiet. "Didn't think so."</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Later that night...</strong>
</p><p>Aizawa was on his way to the school, driving a rental truck carrying extra musical instruments and equipment. He glanced down at his watch, which read 8:35, making it the second time that he ran late in one day.</p><p>"Stupid music rental clerk made me late. That moron didn't know from an oboe to an elbow," Aizawa said irritably, but then started to laugh at his own wordplay. "Elbow... heh, more band humor."</p><p>Once he got to the school, he went into the building and went up to the classroom where all of the students were making the same ad-lib rather than having regular conversations. "Blah, blah... blah, blah, blah, blah... blah, blah, blah..."</p><p>"All right, class, settle down." The ad-lib soon stopped once Aizawa got up in front of the room, standing behind a podium with a baton in one hand. "Okay, now, who here knows how to play an instrument?"</p><p>"Do instruments of darkness count?" Tokoyami asked while raising his hand.</p><p>"No..." deadpanned Aizawa.</p><p>"Is mayonnaise an instrument?" asked Kirishima, raising his hand.</p><p>"No, Eijiro, mayonnaise is not an instrument." Aizawa replied. Kirishima lowers his hand, but then raises it again. "Horseradish is not an instrument, either."</p><p>Kirishima lowers hand before the teacher continued. "That's fine. No one has played an instrument. We'll just start from scratch."</p><p>"When do we get the free food?" Denki asked, but Aizawa ignored his question as he pulled out a flute.</p><p>"All right, try to repeat after me," The teacher instructed, playing six notes on the flute. "Brass section, go."</p><p>The students with brass instruments, which consisted of Iida, Bakugo, Denki, Kirishima, Tokoyami, Kyoka Jiro, Momo Yaoyorozu, and Minoru Mineta repeated the notes but only produced flat sounds.</p><p>"Good, now the Wind." directed Aizawa.</p><p>The students who played the wind instruments, including Todoroki, Ochako, Tsuyu, Shoji, Toru Hagakure and Yuga Aoyama, delivered the same sour notes.</p><p>"And the Drums!"</p><p>The Drum section, with Izuku, Hanta Sero, Mina Ashido, Mashirao Ojiro, Koji Kada, and Rikido Sato, misunderstood what their teacher meant and instead started blowing on their drum sticks. The sticks then blew out of their mouths and stuck Aizawa against the wall.</p><p>The Pro Hero's expression, however, was still glued to his neutral deadpan. "Too bad that didn't kill me."</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Later...</strong>
</p><p>"Now, let's all try stepping in rhythm," instructed Aizawa.</p><p>"Is this the part where we start kicking?" Bakugo asked.</p><p>"No, Bakugo, that's a chorus line." corrected Aizawa.</p><p>"Kicking?! Oh, I wanna do some kicking!" exclaimed Mineta, who kicked Momo in the shin.</p><p>"OW! Why you-" The Creation quirk trainee pounces on Mineta, pulverizing him as they fought and rolled towards the open classroom door.</p><p>As the door closed, the sound of Mineta's screaming was heard from the other side of the door. Everyone was dead silent, awkwardly staring at the closed door until Mineta, who seemed unscathed, sticks his head in. "Whoever is the owner of the white sedan, you left your lights on."</p><p>When he enters the room, his whole body was shown to have been stuffed into a trombone by Momo. Trombone noises were heard with every step he took. As he sat down, a trombone noise was made when Mineta opened his mouth.</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Day 2</strong>
</p><p>The class were practicing their marching on an open street as they played a poor rendition of Semper Fidelis. Hanta and Rikido were in front of the marching formation practicing their flag twirling at a modest pace.</p><p>"That's perfect, everyone! Competition here we come!" Aizawa yelled to his students encouragingly. "Flag twirlers, really turn those things!"</p><p>Hanta and Rikido then twirled their flags at a faster pace, but it wasn't enough for their teacher. "Come on, twirlers, really spin those things! Let's go!"</p><p>The two twirlers spun the flags even more swiftly, but it didn't satisfy Aizawa. "I wanna see more spinning! Let's move! Let's move!"</p><p>Finally, Hanta and Rikido started spinning their flags so hard, that they began to take off into the sky where the two crashed into a blimp, causing it to explode. Everyone mourned for their fallen friends while Todoroki played taps on the trumpet, except for Aizawa, who just curls up into a fetal position.</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Day 3</strong>
</p><p>"How's the harmonica solo coming Koji?" Aizawa asked the teen with the Anivoice quirk.</p><p>Koji nodded silently as he took in a deep breath and gave a hard, prolonged blow on the harmonica. He gave a momentary pant as he made another long blow on it. He continues playing it harshly until he nearly runs out of breath. On the last high note, he gathers enough air to blow into the harmonica but could barely make a strong note and faints.</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Day 4</strong>
</p><p>"Well, this is our last night together before the show," Aizawa announced drearily to his class. "And I know that none of you have improved since we began."</p><p>The Pro Hero glances at Kirishima, who was gnawing on his trumpet. "But I have a theory: People talk loud when they wanna sound smart, right?"</p><p>"YES!" shouted Mineta.</p><p>"So if we play loud, people might think we're good," surmised Aizawa. "Everybody ready?"</p><p>The entire class prepared to play on their instruments as their teacher waved his baton. "And a 1, a 2, a 1, 2, 3, 4!"</p><p>An entire chorus of musical instruments blared throughout the entire school, breaking every glass window in the building. Aizawa's ears rang from having to bear witness to the awfully loud noise, increasing the severity of his painful migraine. His baton split in half from the force of the head-splitting sound.</p><p>"Okay... new theory," Aizawa moaned strenuously. "Maybe if we played so... so...<em> quietly... </em>no one can hear us."</p><p>"Well, maybe we wouldn't sound so bad if Iida didn't play with big, meaty hands!" affronted Bakugo.</p><p>"What did you say, Bakugo-san?" Iida glared at his spiky-haired classmate.</p><p>"Big... meaty... HANDS!" Bakugo repeated loudly.</p><p>"Well, these hands aren't just for making exaggerated hand gestures!" retorted Iida.</p><p>"Bring it on, nerd! BRING IT ON!" Bakugo challenged the Engine quirk trainee.</p><p>"No, guys, don't!" Izuku pleaded as he got between the two fighting boys. "Let's be smart by bringing off."</p><p>"Oh, so the talking broccoli is gonna preach to us!" snarked Kyoka.</p><p>Things got heated as everyone began to bicker with one another. "All right, knock it off, you brats!" scolded Aizawa. "Look, I know tensions are high, but-"</p><p>The confrontation suddenly escalates as everybody started to fight each other aggressively. Ojiro and Rikido were yelling at each other when Toru slammed a drum on top of Rikido.</p><p>"Hey! There is a deposit on that equipment!" Aizawa's chastising sadly fell on deaf ears as the fighting continued.</p><p>Kirishima and Kaminari charged at each with woodwinds, but then scooted to a halt as Mina slams the duo with a pair of cymbals. "Settle down, you brats!" The Pro Hero shouted, but was once again ignored.</p><p>Momo and Shoto fought each other as the Fire and Ice hero trainee's xylophone keys were overpowered by Momo's hammers. Mineta then kicks her in the shin again. The girl glared at the short boy as she chased after him. The clock on the wall suddenly turns to 10 o'clock as everyone stopped fighting.</p><p>"Hey, class is over!" said Hanta as all the students casually said goodbye to their friends.</p><p>Before they could all leave, however, Aizawa stepped in front of the leaving students. He stared at the teens with a dejected and disappointed look. "Well, you've done it. You've taken my one chance of keeping my job here... and crushed it. Crushed it into tiny, bite-sized pieces. I expected so much of you twerps. But I guess that blew up in my face. Don't bother showing up tomorrow. I'll just them you all... died in a marching accident, since I'm going to lose my teaching job, anyway. So thanks... thanks for nothing."</p><p>The now depressed Aizawa exits the classroom, closing the door behind him. The room fell silent and the feeling of disappointment filled the air. A lot of the students felt bad that they drove their teacher away because of their unruly behavior. Had they have known that Aizawa was going to be fired, they would've tried to cooperate more.</p><p>Izuku frowned, "What kind of monsters are we? That poor man came to us in his hour of need... and we failed him."</p><p>"Technically, he forced us to be in this stupid band-OW!" muttered Bakugo, as Shoto elbowed him in the gut.</p><p>"Aizawa-sensei was always there for us, even when he was really fed up with our antics," Izuku continued as he turned to Tsuyu. "Tsuyu, when you were attacked by Tomura Shigaraki, who rescued you?"</p><p>"Aizawa-sensei, kero." Tsuyu replied.</p><p>"And Aoyama, when your eyes went temporarily blind from your constant sparkles, who gave you eye drops?" Izuku asked the fabulous boy.</p><p>"Why, Aizawa-sensei, of course," flaunted Aoyama.</p><p>"Right! So if Aizawa-sensei could be able to stop a villain or offer you eye drops, then I am confident that we can pull ourselves together and know what it truly means... to be in a marching band." proclaimed Izuku.</p><p>"Yeah! For Aizawa-sensei!" Ochako cheered as the entire congregation of teens joined in revelation.</p><p>"Now let's make our sensei proud!" Izuku picked up a baton as everyone gathered their instruments and prepared to practice their song. "A 1, a 2, a 1, 2, 3, 4!"</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>The Next Morning; Marching Band Competition</strong>
</p><p>Aizawa swaggered despondly when he approached the local stadium that hosted the competition, wondering how he was gonna face the rest of the school staff. "Great, now what am I gonna tell them? Toshi, Hizashi, Nezu... I've doomed the whole friggin' school at this point."</p><p>He enters the back entrance of the stadium where he came into the locker room. "I only hope that they don't find-"</p><p>"Eraser Head!" boomed an enthusiastic voice that belonged to the #1 Hero himself, All Might, in his muscular form. Beside him was Present Mic and U.A. principal, a ferret named Nezu, or rather, Mr. Principal.</p><p>"...out." Aizawa groaned.</p><p>"See, I told you he would be here, Toshi." said Present Mic.</p><p>"So, Aizawa, where's your band?" asked Nezu cheerfully.</p><p>"Oh, they couldn't come, they... died," Aizawa responded nervously.</p><p>All Might then cocked an eyebrow, "Ah, then who is that?" The Pro Hero pointed behind Aizawa's direction as the depressed teacher turned around and saw the entire class of 1-A, dressed in marching band uniforms.</p><p>"Eeh... that would... be my... band," said a wide-eyed Aizawa.</p><p>"We're ready to perform, Aizawa-sensei!" exclaimed Izuku optimistically.</p><p>"Wow, Aizawa! This is exactly how I thought your band would look!" Mic said enthusiastically as he and the Erasure hero watched Izuku do a little happy dance.</p><p>"That's his... eager face." Aizawa explained.</p><p>"Ah," Mic said.</p><p>"Well, then, let us all proceed to the outfield and start the show!" exclaimed Nezu.</p><p>Aizawa sighed as he, the staff, and the band went out onto the field. "After this, I may as well pack up my desk."</p><p>"Don't worry, sensei!" assured Ochako.</p><p>"We've got this in the bag!" smiled Iida.</p><p>"Yeah, my breakfast," The teacher retorted as the band gathered on the field in time for Present Mic to announce them.</p><p>"ALL RIGHT, HEROIC FANS! PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER! FOR U.A. HIGH SCHOOL'S SUPER BAAANNNDD~!" announced the Pro Hero as an entire crowd of live-action people filled the entire stadium cheering for the band to play.</p><p>"These are some ugly looking people," Bakugo commented.</p><p>"Maybe we're near one of those toxic waste dumps," surmised Kirishima.</p><p>"I think I'm gonna be sick," groaned Denki.</p><p>"All right, everyone," Aizawa nervously glances back at the school staff, who were watching the show on the sidelines. All Might, Nezu, Mic and the other teachers and staff gave him a thumbs up. "Let's get this over with. 4, 3, 2, 1..."</p><p>The teacher flinches as he waited for the impending trainwreck that was the band's god-awful performance. However, the sound of beautiful, melodious horns surprised Aizawa. He opened his eyes as he saw the brass section, Mineta, Momo, Koji, Ojiro, Toru, Mina, Hanta, Shoji, Rikido, and Aoyama, play an orchestrated intro with their horns.</p><p>Then, Shoto Todoroki began to play on the electronic keyboard as the song began. A spotlight shined on Izuku, holding a microphone in his hand as he sang in the voice of David Glen Eisley.</p><p>
  <strong>Izuku:</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>The winner takes all...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It's the thrill of one more kill.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The next one to fall...</em>
</p><p>Aizawa watched in awe as one of his students sang the awesome rock ballad.</p><p>
  <em>Will never sacrifice their will!</em>
</p><p>The beat begins to kick in with Bakugo on the drums, Tokoyami and Jiro on lead guitar, Kaminari on bass, Ochako on the keytar and Iida, Kirishima and Tsuyu twirling flags while a flashing concert stage appeared on the field, pyrotechnics, laser lights and all.</p><p>
  <em>Don't ever look back...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>On the world closin' in!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Be on the attack...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>With your wings on the wind!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Oh, the games will begin!</em>
</p><p>The teachers watched in astonishment as they were floored by the band's presentation and execution. Grinning with excitement, Aizawa tosses his baton aside and conducted the band with his arms. The audience in the stadium illuminated the seating areas with their lighters while they passionately listened to the song. Some of them even cried tears of joy.</p><p>
  <em>And it's sweet, sweet, sweet victory...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>YEAH!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And it's ours for the taking...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It's ours for the fight!</em>
</p><p>All Might, who was sitting with the teachers, cheered the band on when he suddenly started coughing up blood and reverted back to his weakened form. He discreetly steps out as he didn't want his true form to be seen. Aizawa runs towards the middle of the stage, posing as pyrotechnics shot up at the same time.</p><p>
  <em>And it's sweet, sweet, sweet victory...</em>
</p><p>
  <em>YEAH!</em>
</p><p>Tokoyami then delivers a sick guitar sting as he slided on the stage, shredding his electric guitar like a professional.</p><p>
  <em>And the one who's last to fall!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>We will have sweet, sweet victory...</em>
</p><p>Bakugo's fierce drum line soon followed while Aizawa danced to the beat and finally jumped in the air and the scene freezes and fades to black.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chocolate with Quirks</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The day started off as normal as the students and teachers of U.A. High School attended classes so that the wannabe heroes would build themselves up to become professionals among the ranks of Pro-Heroes All Might and Eraserhead. Every day a mailman would come by to drop off mail for the receivers to sort out amongst themselves. One mailman on this particular day is making his scheduled delivery to the school as he came up to the P.O. boxes in the student dormitories. As he opened one P.O. box in particular, a certain Electric-quirk character's head popped out of the box.</p><p>"HI MAILMAN!" greeted Denki Kaminari, scaring the mailman, causing him to drop the mail in his hands and run away in fear. "Okay! See you tomorrow!"</p><p>Kaminari then pulled himself out of the P.O. box that he somehow fit himself into, just as his friend Eijiro Kirishima, the Hardening-quirk hero trainee, came up to him. "Hey, the mail's here. What did we get?"</p><p>"Let's see... Midoriya, Yaoyorozu, Sato, Todoroki, Asui-Hey, a magazine!" beamed Kaminari as he found a magazine titled "Fancy Living Digest."</p><p>"'Fancy Living Digest?' Is that one of Mineta's new porno magazines?" Kirishima asked naïvely.</p><p>"Nah, I think it's one of those rich people magazines about rich people or something. I wonder who subscribed to this." Kaminari pondered.</p><p>"Definitely somebody else in our school." Kirishima surmised.</p><p>Kaminari flipped through the magazine as he and Kirishima gawked at the dozens of pictures of millionaires and billionaires doing what millionaires and billionaires normally do. "Now that's what I call First Class. This guy's so rich he's got a swimming in his swimming pool."</p><p>"He's got shoes." Kirishima said in awe as he pointed to rich guy's shoes.</p><p>Suddenly, an swift hand snatches the magazine from Kaminari's hands as the true owner of the reclaims his mail.</p><p>"Give me that! Stealing my mail, eh, 1-A scum? You're lucky I'm not reporting you to the police." said the owner, who turns out to be Neito Monoma of Class 1-B, Class 1-A's rival class.</p><p>"Oh, hey, Monoma. How's Tetsutetsu doing?" Kirishima asked politely.</p><p>"Fine, better than you would ever be, Kirishima." sneered Monoma.</p><p>"I knew it! If Tetsutetsu think he's gonna be manlier than me, he's gotta another thing coming!" The Harden-quirk teen smiled in determination as he thought of besting his rival.</p><p>"Say, Monoma, how do all those rich people in that magazine get all that money?" asked the Electric-quirk trainee.</p><p>"Well, in case you Class 1-A plebes didn't know, they're entrepreneurs; they sell stuff to people. Stuff that people want to buy. Now keep your dirty hands off my mail." Monoma said bluntly as he walked away with his magazine.</p><p>"You know what, Kirishima, I think Monoma just gave me an idea." Kaminari said as he snapped his fingers as a thought came to him. "I got it! We should become entrepreneurs and sell stuff to people!"</p><p>"Is that gonna hurt?" Kirishima asked concernly.</p><p>"Quick, Kirishima, without thinking! If you could have anything in the world, what would it be?" Kaminari asked quickly.</p><p>"Uhh... more time for thinking? No, wait! We should sell them manliness! Yeah, lots of manliness!" Kirishima suggested as he showed off his physical prowess.</p><p>"No, like a physical item, something you would pay for." Kaminari said specifically.</p><p>"A chocolate bar?" The shark-toothed teen asked.</p><p>"That's a great idea! We'll be traveling chocolate bar salesman!" Kaminari proclaimed. "To the supermarket!"</p><p>"Awesome! But first we need a license." Kirishima said enthusiastically, which immediately struck a chord with Kaminari.</p><p>"Oh, yeah... and we also have school. Let's just wait until Saturday." The Electric-quirk boy said sheepishly.</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Saturday</strong>
</p><p>Later that weekend, after getting their Vendor's License, the two boys walked out of the supermarket with two shopping carts full of chocolate bars with intent to sell them to the public.</p><p>"All right, Kirishima, now that we have the legal right to sell chocolate, it's Fancy Living or bust!" Kaminari said with a gleam in his eye.</p><p>"Make way for a couple of auntré-penooers!" Kirishima said excitedly while mispronouncing 'entrepreneurs.'</p><p>The duo walked a few blocks before finding an apartment building that was perfect for selling chocolate to the tenants that lived there.</p><p>"This is it, Kirishima. Our first step to living fancy! Just follow my lead." Kaminari demonstrated by knocking on the first apartment door.</p><p>The door opens up as the person who answered was revealed to be Mello from Death Note in a casual cameo. "Oh, hey. Can I help you with something?"</p><p>"You sure can, sir. Could we interest you in some chocolate?" Kaminari asked politely as he held up a chocolate bar.</p><p>"Chocolate? Did you say chocolate?" Mello said, whose eyes widened intensely.</p><p>"Yes, sir, with or without nuts." Kirishima offered as he held up both bars in each hand.</p><p>"Chocolate? CHOCOLATE?!" Mello yelled as his voice became louder and his tone grew angrier. <strong>"CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE!"</strong></p><p>Kaminari and Kirishima backed away slowly before running down the hallway while Mello gave chase.</p><p>"Run, run, run, run, RUN!" Kirishima yelled as he and Kaminari ran for their lives as Mello screamed and chased after them.</p><p>
  <strong>"CHOOOOCOLAAAATTE!"</strong>
</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Later...</strong>
</p><p>"Man, that guy was scary. Good thing he didn't follow us onto the next floor when we got into the elevator." Kirishima sighed with relief.</p><p>"Yeah, that first guy didn't count. THIS is our real first step." Kaminari reiterated as he knocked on the next door.</p><p>The door opens up to reveal another stranger (which turned out to be Dabi wearing Groucho glasses) who looked down at the duo. "Yeah, what do you want?"</p><p>"Good morning, sir, would you like to buy some chocolate?" Kaminari asked courteously.</p><p>"Chocolate bars, huh?" The disguised Dabi smiled wickedly as he thought of a way to deceive the two U.A. students.</p><p>"Yes, sir, we're chocolate bar salesmen." beamed Kirishima.</p><p>Dabi chuckled as he spoke with a friendly demeanor. "Oh, a couple of mediocre salesmen. I can tell, you seem to be having trouble carrying your merchandise."</p><p>"Well, our hands are a little full..." Kaminari pondered as he looked at his arms, which were filled with candy bars.</p><p>"You two wanna be good salesmen, correct?" Dabi asked.</p><p>"Oh, most certainly, sir!" The boys said gleefully.</p><p>"I thought so. No self-respecting candy bar salesman would be caught dead without one of these." Dabi said as he pulled out an orange bag.</p><p>"What is it?" Kaminari asked.</p><p>"It's a candy bar bag. It's specifically designed to cradle each candy bar in velvet-lined comfort." The masked villain showed the two boys as the latter were completely enamoured by the device. "But I'm wasting my time. You don't need these bags."</p><p>"WE NEED THEM! WE NEED THEM!" The boys begged, which brought a dubious grin on Dabi's face.</p><p>After paying for the bags and then packing their chocolate in each bag, Denki and Eijiro went on their merry way.</p><p>"Good luck, boys. Happy hunting." Dabi called out to the duo as he counted the money. "Heh-heh, suckers."</p><p>"Fancy living! Here we come! La, la, la, la, laaa!" Kaminari and Kirishima sang as they walked to the next apartment.</p><p>"Let's try next door." said Kaminari as the latter knocked on the door.</p><p>The door opens as a familiar face appeared in the doorway; it was Dabi once wearing, still donning his comical disguise. "Hello?" said Dabi.</p><p>"Hey, weren't you the same guy next door?" The Electric boy inquired.</p><p>"What do you mean? I've never seen you before." Dabi replied with innocence.</p><p>"Yeah, you did, you sold us these candy bar bags." Kirishima implied.</p><p>"Hmm... I don't recall. But it looks to me like you two have got a lot of bags there." Dabi observed as he pulled put two larger red bags. "You two wouldn't be caught dead without my patented candy bar bag carrying bags."</p><p>Kirishima and Kaminari exchanged glances as the Hardening boy replied without hesitation. "We'll take twenty."</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Apartment Rooftop</strong>
</p><p>Eijiro and Denki later climbed up to the top of the apartment building in hopes of finding a Pro Hero on patrol who might be willing to buy their chocolate.</p><p>"You see anyone yet, Eijiro?" Kaminari asked as he scanned the area with a pair of binoculars.</p><p>"Nope," replied Kirishima as he used a pair of binoculars to look around as well. He then sees the Pro Hero Mt. Lady towering over the buildings as she walked by them. "Hey, look! It's Mt. Lady!"</p><p>"All right! She's gotta be hungry after patrolling the city for so long. Hand me the flare gun." Kaminari said as Kirishima gave him a flare which he uses to shoot up into the air to get the giant Pro Hero's attention.</p><p>Mt. Lady turned as she saw the signal flare light up over the apartment building. She strolled over to the building, wondering if someone on the rooftop was in danger. "Are you boys all right? Do you need help getting down from the roof?" She asked concernly.</p><p>"We're okay, Mt. Lady. We're selling chocolate bars and we were just wondering if you would like to buy some." Denki offered.</p><p>"Oh, is that all? That sounds heavenly! I'll take one!" Mt. Lady replied sweetly.</p><p>"Okay, one chocolate bar coming up." said Kaminari as he zipped open a red bag and pulled out a smaller orange bag. He opens the orange bag, only to pull out another orange bag.</p><p>Confused, Kaminari opens the orange bag and pulls another from that one. "Eijiro, how many bags did we buy?"</p><p>"I dunno, a lot, I guess." Kirishima assumed.</p><p>Kaminari glanced up at Mt. Lady and laughed nervously as he opened the orange bag and pulled out another. With every orange bag he opens, he continuously opens more bags which were stuffed with bags upon bags upon bags.</p><p>"Come on, it's gotta be in here!" Denki said with slight aggravation. Meanwhile, Kirishima took off his pants and started zipping and unzipping the pants for no reason.</p><p>"I don't have time for this," Mt. Lady sighed impatiently as she went on with her patrol.</p><p>Finally, after zipping through multiple bags, Kaminari finally found the candy bar. "I got it! One chocolate bar for Mt.-"</p><p>
  <strong>"CHOOOOCOLAAAATTE!"</strong>
</p><p>"...Lady." Denki frowned as Mello had began to chase the two boys again.</p><p>
  <strong>"CHOOOOCOLAAAATTE! CHOOOOCOLAAAATTE!"</strong>
</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Diner</strong>
</p><p>"We're not doing so good, Kirishima," Kaminari said exhaustively as he and his friend sat at a booth in a nearby diner. "We need to find a new tactic if we're gonna be living fancy."</p><p>"Being an entrepreneur is harder than it looks." Kirishima groaned when a thought came to him. "I know! Let's get naked!"</p><p>"Nah, let's save that for when we're selling real estate." Kaminari replied to the Hardening-quirk trainee's innane solution. "Remember when we bought those bags from that weird guy who looked kinda familiar?"</p><p>"He said we were mediocre." Kirishima said.</p><p>"It's because he made us feel special. He knew how to flatter us and that's why we bought those bags." Denki surmised.</p><p>"Yeah, he did... I'M GOING BACK TO BUY MORE BAGS!" Kirishima beamed with excitement as he was about to run out of the diner.</p><p>"Wait! Eijiro!" Kaminari shouted which stopped the Hardening-quirk boy in his tracks. "Why don't we try being nice?"</p><p>"Oh, okay." Kirishima smiled in agreement.</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Back at the Apartment Building...</strong>
</p><p>The two students continued their door-to-door adventure as they approached the next door. "Remember Kirishima, just give the customer a some of your charm; make him feel good." instructed Kaminari.</p><p>"Right, got'cha." Kirishima nodded as he knocked on the apartment door.</p><p>The door opens as Saitama from One Punch Man (another cameo) appeared in the doorway. "Hello?"</p><p>"I love you." Kirishima said with a cringey smile on his face. The creeped out Saitama almost immediately slams the door in front of the red-haired boy.</p><p>"Uhh, that was a little too direct, Kiri, let me try." said the blond-haired boy as he knocked on the door.</p><p>"Who is that at the door, Master?" said a voice that was heard from inside the apartment.</p><p>"Just some creepy kids hanging out in the hallway. One of them just said that he loved me for no reason." said Saitama from the other side of the door.</p><p>"Shall I redirect them from your presence?" asked the second voice.</p><p>"I dunno, they probably want something." The bald man replied.</p><p>The door opened again as a cyborg named Genos answered the door, with his roommate standing behind him. "Yes, may I help you?"</p><p>"Hi, sorry to bother you, but we were just wondering how you're doing today." Kaminari said politely.</p><p>"How we are doing?" Genos replied.</p><p>"Eh, fine, I guess." The bald man said nonchalantly.</p><p>"Wanna buy some chocolate?" offered Kaminari.</p><p>"Chocolate? Oh, sure I might buy some." Saitama said as he reached into his coin purse.</p><p>"WE GOT HIM NOW!" Kirishima shouted ecstatically.</p><p>"I am sorry, but I am afraid we must decline," Genos rejected with a formal, robotic tone. "Chocolate has high-sugar content and sugar turns to bubbling fat. Wouldn't you agree, young man?"</p><p>"Hey! I'll have you know that MY bubbles are manly!" Kirishima retorted as he lifted his shirt to show bubbles forming on his stomach. "Hehe, it tickles."</p><p>"Come on, Genos, it's just a little bit of chocolate." Saitama said reasonably.</p><p>"Master, it is important that we stick to our daily diet so that we can remain fit." The cyborg replied as he pulled out a pamphlet and gave it to Kirishima. "If you young men are interested, I recommend reading this pamphlet about dieting. You may keep it for five yen."</p><p>"I'll take ten!" The Harden-quirk boy said eagerly, pulling out a fat stack of yen.</p><p>Kaminari sighed as he and Kirishima walked down the hall. "It's been hours and we still haven't sold one chocolate bar. I think we're getting too distracted."</p><p>"Huh..." said an absent-minded Kirishima as he read through one of the pamphlets he bought.</p><p>"From now on, we gotta stay focused when we start selling at the next apartment." proclaimed Kaminari.</p><p>"What?" Kirishima muttered.</p><p>"Let's shake on it." Denki said as he extended his hand to indicate a handshake.</p><p>"Did you say something?" Kirishima asked.</p><p>"Remember, Kirishima, focus." The Electric boy said as he knocked on the next door.</p><p>A man opens up and steps into the doorway. "Yes?"</p><p>"Good afternoon, sir. We're selling chocolate bars, would you-" Kaminari pauses as he notices Kirishima staring at the man with long bulgy eyes. "Dude, what are you doing?"</p><p>"Focusing..." The shark-toothed boy kept staring at the man, which made the latter feel uneasy.</p><p>The man backs away from the doorway as Kirishima's eyes stretched out and followed him. "Back off, Jack!" The man slams the door on Kirishima, who's eyes got caught in the frame.</p><p>"OW!" shouted Kirishima while his eyes still kept functioning as he the scanned the interior of the apartment. "Nice place you got here."</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Later on the apartment rooftop...</strong>
</p><p>The boys sat on the rooftop as Kaminari contemplated to himself. "I don't get it. What are we doing wrong here?"</p><p>"I don't get anything either." Kirishima commented.</p><p>"There must be something to this selling game. Even the Pro-Heroes do it, I mean look at that!" exclaimed Kaminari as he pointed to a billboard that advertised Pro-Hero Jeanist's brand of denim jeans.</p><p>"'Wear Best Jeanist's Jeans; They're the Best!'" Eijiro read from the billboard.</p><p>"They're most certainly not the best!" said Kaminari.</p><p>"I beg to differ," Kirishima retorted as he ripped his pants off to reveal a pair of Best Jeanist's Jeans that he wore under his current pair of pants. "THESE PANTS ARE MANLY!"</p><p>"My point exactly..." Denki said while staring at his friend blankly. "That guy sells a million pairs of jeans per day, and they're not even good in quality."</p><p>"Well, maybe if the advertisers didn't stretch the truth they wouldn't sell as many." surmised Kirishima.</p><p>Just then, an epiphany immediately came to Kaminari. "That's it, Kirishima! We gotta stretch the truth-"</p><p>
  <strong>"CHOOOOCOLAAAATTE!"</strong>
</p><p>"Oh, come on! Leave us alone already!" cried Kaminari as he and Kirishima bolted as Mello gave chase once again.</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Later...</strong>
</p><p>"Okay, so here's the plan: We'll work as a team. I'll keep the customer warmed up and you go in for the kill." Kaminari explained as he and Kirishima went up to the next apartment.</p><p>"The kill..." Kirishima said intently.</p><p>Kaminari knocked on the door as an old lady opened up. "Yes?" She asked.</p><p>"Hello, young lady," The Electric-quirk boy greeted in a smooth-talking manner while Kirishima giggled. "We're selling chocolate. Is your mother home?"</p><p>"MOM!" The old lady yelled as an older, more decrepit old woman in a wheelchair came up to the doorway.</p><p>"What? What! What's all that yelling?!" She shouted, as the two boys gave awkward stares at the older lady. "You just can't wait for me to die, can you?"</p><p>"They're selling chocolate." said the older woman's daughter.</p><p>"Chocolate?" The mother inferred.</p><p>"Yeah!" The daughter replied loudly.</p><p>"What? What are they selling?!" yelled the mother, who could barely hear her daughter.</p><p>"Chocolate!" shouted the daughter.</p><p>"What?"</p><p>"Chocolate!"</p><p>"I can't hear you!"</p><p>"THEY'RE SELLING CHOCOLATE!" The daughter yelled at the top of her lungs.</p><p>"They're selling chocolate?" The mother replied.</p><p>"YEAH!" shouted the younger old lady.</p><p>"Chocolate... I remember when they first invented chocolate. Sweet, sweet chocolate," The mother said dreamily before changing her sentimental tone to that of a bitter disposition. "I always hated it!"</p><p>"Uhh, this chocolate's not for eating, it's for..." Kaminari explained as he tried to think of a clever pitch.</p><p>"You rub it on your skin and it makes you live forever!" Kirishima said.</p><p>"No, no, no, no, no...!" The daughter implored silently.</p><p>"Live forever, you say? I'll take one!" The mother accepted as the daughter face-palmed herself as she exchanged money for a bar of chocolate. "Come on you lazy Mary, start rubbing me with that chocolate!"</p><p>The daughter then shot an angry glare at Kaminari and Kirishima. "I hate you..." She whispered before slamming the door shut.</p><p>"Yes! We did it! If we keep exaggerating the truth, we'll be living fancy in no time!" Kaminari exclaimed happily.</p><p>"I never thought I would say this, but hooray for lying!" beamed Kirishima.</p><p>The two boys' half-brained scheme seems to be working as they go around the apartment building on every floor selling their chocolate like it was an enterprise. At one apartment, they convinced one tenant that their chocolate would grow hair; in another apartment, they would say that eating chocolate would make them smarter. Eventually, they would go to almost every apartment in the building, coming up with every exaggerated truth they could think of to sell more chocolate. They finally reach another apartment door as they came up with another idea.</p><p>"This'll be the best lie yet! This guy will feel so sorry, he'll have to buy all of our chocolate!" Kaminari grinned as he and his shark-toothed friend were covered in bandages and hoisted themselves with crutches.</p><p>"I dunno, this seems a little insensitive, Denki." Kirishima said admittedly.</p><p>"Come on, it's not like we're offending anybody. What could go wrong." scoffed Kaminari as he knocked on the door of the apartment.</p><p>The door cracked open slightly as a man peeked through. "Hello? What can I do for you boys?" The man said weakly.</p><p>"Would you like to buy a chocolate bar? We need an operation." Kaminari lied.</p><p>"Really? Hm, what a small world." said the man as he opened the door all the way as he is revealed to have a full-body cast and a respirator mask connected to a oxygen tank. "What seems to be the matter with you two?"</p><p>The man's appearance surprised the two boys, which brought out an awkward tension from them. "Umm, we've got some head trauma and eternal bleeding." Denki replied.</p><p>"Some guys have all the luck," The man sighed weakly. "I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every morning I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep."</p><p>Kaminari and Kirishima were on the verge of tears from hearing this injured man's backstory when he suddenly falls forward. The Harden-quirk boy catches the man in his arms, preventing the poor soul from hurting himself. Nevertheless, the man groaned with severe pain.</p><p>"Quick! Let's get him inside!" ordered Kaminari as they take the invalid man back into his apartment. "Okay, just put him on the couch gently."</p><p>Kirishima does so as the man kept groaning in agony. "You okay, man? Do we need to call an ambulance?" The red-haired boy asked concernly.</p><p>"No, it's alright. This happens to me all the time." The man insisted.</p><p>"You poor man," Kaminari said sympathetically. "Is there anything we can do for you?"</p><p>"Well, there is one thing," The man explained. "For obvious reasons, my medical bills are extremely high. But, fortunately, I'm able to keep myself alive by selling... chocolate bars."</p><p>The boys look over in the corner of the living room where stacks of wooden crates filled with chocolate bars are kept.</p><p>"You want us to sell more chocolate?" Kaminari asked.</p><p>"If it'll help you get the care you need, then we'll buy all of your chocolate!" affirmed Kirishima.</p><p>"Really? Oh, how thoughtful of you." thanked the injured man.</p><p>"Here," Kaminari sighed as he took out all the money that he and Kirishima collected from selling chocolate and handed it the man. "I'm not sure if it's enough to pay your bills, but it's still enough pay for the chocolate."</p><p>"Just set it on the nightstand over there." said the man as Denki puts the money on the nightstand. Kirishima and Kaminari proceed to pick up the crates as they left the apartment.</p><p>"Such nice boys." The man then gave a sinister smile. "It does my heart good to con a couple of Class-A suckers like those two."</p><p>The man almost immediately got up from the couch as he unzipped his disguise and he revealed himself to be Dabi dressed as an invalid. He counted the money left on the nightstand as he picked up the phone and called someone. "Hey, Tomura, change of plans. We're eating out tonight."</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Meanwhile with Kaminari and Kirishima...</strong>
</p><p>"Don't get me wrong, Kirishima, it's great that we helped that guy out and all," Denki said as he carried his crate full of chocolate. "But I don't think there's anyone else that we can sell chocolate to in this entire building."</p><p>"Don't worry, Kaminari, maybe somebody else in town will buy our chocolate." Kirishima said assuringly.</p><p>Kaminari drops the crate and sits on it as he sulked in defeat. "Nah, it wouldn't matter. We still wouldn't have earned enough money to actually have fancy living. Let's face it, man, we suck."</p><p>"I can live with that." Kirishima replied as he dropped his crate and sat on it. "Being an entrepreneur wasn't my calling anyway."</p><p>"Let's just change our names to 'Why' and 'Bother.'" Denki sighed dejectedly.</p><p>Suddenly, Mello appeared behind the two boys as he bellowed his threatening mantra, scaring the latter in the process. <strong>"CHOOOOCOLAAAATTE!"</strong></p><p>"No, please, don't hurt us!" pleaded Kaminari while he embraced Kirishima in fear.</p><p>"We're just kids! What do you want from us?!" cried Kirishima as he held onto Kaminari in return.</p><p>Mello laughed maniacally. "FINALLY! I've been trying to catch you boys all day! Now that I've got you where I want you..."</p><p>He then pulls out an extremely large pile of cash as his psychotic tone shifted to a calmer voice. "I'd like to buy all your chocolate."</p><p>The boys froze as chocolate bars came pouring out of Kirishima's pants until all that was left was a little chocolate kiss. They both fainted as a flood of relief overwhelmed them.</p><p>"Thank you for your patronage." Kaminari said wearily.</p><p>After giving away all of their chocolate to their highest-paying customer, Kaminari and Kirishima walked triumphantly as the Hardening boy carried all of the profits in a wheelbarrow.</p><p>"Are we living the fancy life yet, Kaminari?" Eijiro asked.</p><p>"Not yet," said the Electric boy. "First, we gotta spend all the money."</p><p>"But what are we gonna spend it on?" Kirishima asked.</p><p>"I think I have an idea..." thought Kaminari.</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Fancy Restaurant</strong>
</p><p>Neito Monoma was dressed sharply as he came up to the waiter standing at the podium in the lobby. "Good evening, sir. Table for one, please."</p><p>"I'm sorry, sir, but the whole restaurant has been booked for a private event." said the waiter.</p><p>"But it's my only night to be fancy. Who would be able to afford to rent out the whole restaurant?" Monoma demanded.</p><p>"Oh, a couple of rich entrepreneurs... and their dates." The waiter replied.</p><p>Meanwhile in the dining area, Kaminari and Kirishima were sitting at a table with the older lady and her daughter from before having dinner with them.</p><p>"So, how long have you two known each other?" Kaminari asked the old ladies.</p><p>"What? What did he say?" The mother asked her daughter, who just had a blank stare on her face.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. U.A. Academy Training Video</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The video begins with the U.A. logo and its motto "Go Beyond! Plus Ultra!" displayed in the intro. A flashy montage starts as motivational instrumental music played to give the video a positive vibe; several key aspects of U.A. High School are shown, including the classrooms, cafeteria, dormitories, training facilities, hospital wing, and other canon locations at the school that have been showcased in the manga and anime thus far. The montage ends with a frontal shot of the main campus building.</p><p>"Welcome, First Years!" announced the narrator who greets the reader with an informative and optimistic manner; a rainbow with the text 'Congratulations' swiped across the screen. "If you're watching this video, then let me be the first to say: 'Congratulations!' You've recently been enrolled in U.A. Academy and this is your first day of Pro Hero training!"</p><p>Izuku Midoriya, in his school uniform, appears on screen as he transitions into his 'Deku' hero suit; he smiles excitedly and turns to the camera as he talks to the narrator, "Can I learn how to be a hero now?"</p><p>"Oh, no, you've got a lot to learn before you're ready to become a hero," The narrator retorted as he continued, "As you can see by this graph…"</p><p>The next scene cuts to a giraffe; the narrator clears his throat, "GRAPH…"</p><p>A graph appears as the line on the grid rises, "You have been enrolled in one of the most successful hero academies in Japan. But it didn't get that way overnight…"</p><p>The school is shown again as it transitions to night, "...because the school day ends at 3:00."</p><p>A picture of U.A.'s principal, Nezu, is shown as the narrator began, "No, the story of U.A. is the story of one man's Hard Work, Perseverance, Vision, Determination, and Sweat…"</p><p>The picture is then zoomed in on Nezu's sweaty armpit, "But mostly, his Sweat."</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>
    <span>FROM HUMBLE BEGINNINGS</span>
  </strong>
</p><p>An old laboratory video of Nezu as a normal mouse running on a wheel in his cage is shown. "You may think that Nezu, aka the Pro Hero, Mr. Principal, of U.A. High School, has always been the eccentric educator that he is today…" The narrator said as mouse Nezu jumped down from his wheel, pushed a small button that dropped food pellets from a chute and landed in his food bowl; the little mouse took a pellet from the bowl and nibbled on the pellet. "...and you're right!"</p><p>The next scene cuts to a picture of Nezu, who was sitting on his bed with a looming depression as the light in the window illuminates the dark, shaded bedroom.</p><p>"After escaping his cruel life in a Quirk-testing facility, Nezu stayed secluded in a deep depression that seemed endless," The narrator said as the scene transitions to U.A. as Nezu is shown. "But then his luck changed when he rose in the Pro Hero ranks and found a career as an educator at a newly established high school for Quirk-users, and with a few minor alterations, the prestigious stigma of U.A. Academy was born!"</p><p>The sound of a baby crying is heard when the scene cuts to the U.A. logo.</p><p>"Sounds like a lot of…" The narrator spoke but was suddenly interrupted.</p><p>"HOOPLA!" shouted an unknown voice.</p><p>"Sounds like a lot of…" The narrator tried to continue but was interrupted again by the same voice.</p><p>"HOOPLA!"</p><p>"Sounds like a…"</p><p>"HOOPLA!" The screen scrolls over to Minoru Mineta, who was shouting on the far right side of the scene. "HOOPLA!"</p><p>Someone off-screen then throws a brick at Mineta, which conks the small boy in the head and knocks him out cold; the screen then scrolls back to the logo.</p><p>"Sounds like a lot of 'Hoopla' to make over having a Quirk, right?" The narrator chuckled but then replied with a harsh tone. "WRONG!"</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>
    <span>U.A. HIGH SCHOOL TODAY</span>
  </strong>
</p><p>Another montage played with more shots of the school, but the duration was kept shorter as the narrator continued with the presentation.</p><p>"To keep up with today's educational standards, no expense has been spared to acquire all the latest achievements in extracurricular technology."</p><p>"This here is a lead-fueled, note-taking mechanism," Shota Aizawa, the U.A. teacher and Pro Hero, Eraser Head, said dryly as he indicated to the camera while he showed a mechanical pencil as a 'technological' tool; he then presented a desktop computer, "Here you can see our automatic information retrieval system. Don't worry, we've filtered out the inappropriate websites.</p><p>"These are high quality storage units… imported," Aizawa added as he presented the hallway lockers. He also goes on to the vending machine and allows the viewer to observe its modernized advancements as he inserts a few coins into the machine and dispenses a can of soda, "This here is a prototype beverage dispensing machine."</p><p>The last thing that the teacher shows is a printer, "And most importantly, you got your state-of-the-art laser document press. Now are you gonna go to class or just stand there, because there's a rule against standing around."</p><p>"All of this modernization seems a little overwhelming, doesn't it? Well, luckily for you, Mr. Principal's fear of robot overlords keeps the balance of technology in check." Another scene changes to Izuku standing in the hallway next to Katsuki Bakugo as the narrator spoke, "But if modernization is the heart of U.A., then the students are the liver and gallbladder."</p><p>The screen then focuses on Izuku as the green-haired boy had a gleam of determination in his highlighted anime eyes and innocence in his dorky, adorable smile, "Let's see if you got what it takes: Hmm, poised, confident, and a smile that says, 'Hello world! I am ready to learn!'"</p><p>"But for every good student, there is always one who is not so good," explained the narrator as the screen zooms in on Bakugo, who gave off an aloof disposition, almost like a Tsundere. "Let's see: inattentive, impatient, a glazed look in the eyes."</p><p>The screen closes in on a button that Bakugo was wearing on the hem of his school uniform, to which the narrator points out, "Look carefully at the 'I Really Wish You Weren't Here Right Now (seriously, though, piss off)' button. There's names for students like this, but we'll call him… Bakugo."</p><p>"Hey! I heard that!" Bakugo glared at the fourth wall as he was further agitated by the narrator's comments.</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>
    <span>TRAINING</span>
  </strong>
</p><p>"Does this mean I get to learn how to be a hero now?" Izuku asked again.</p><p>"No, you can't learn to be a hero unless you learn the phrase: HECK."</p><p>"HECK?"</p><p>"Once you understand HECK, you'll understand your position as a Pro Hero. But what does HECK mean?" The narrator implied as Izuku shrugged since the wannabe hero is unsure of the acronym's meaning. "It's actually a carefully organized code…"</p><p><strong>H</strong>eroes</p><p><strong>E</strong>arn</p><p><strong>C</strong>redited</p><p><strong>K</strong>udos</p><p>"Oh! HECK!" Izuku chirped as he crossed his arms proudly.</p><p>"Looks like Mr. Midoriya understands HECK." The narrator said as the scene cuts to a classroom where Ochako Uraraka picks Tsuyu Asui up off the floor as an example of the HECK code. "Here's a typical civilian being saved by a hero. I wonder what will happen. Well, if we just remember HECK, we can figure it out."</p><p>"Thank you for saving me! I want to give you…" Before Tsuyu could finish, the narrator interrupts the scene with a short quiz.</p><p>"Do you think she's going to give her…"</p><p><strong>A.</strong> <strong>a sofa</strong></p><p>
  <strong>B. an expensive haircut</strong>
</p><p>or <strong>C. credited kudos</strong></p><p>"...credited kudos!" Tsuyu said finally as the scenario resumed.</p><p>"Ah, HECK! You never let us down!" cheered the narrator. "Now that you understand HECK, I bet you think you're ready to learn how to be a hero!"</p><p>"GO BEYOND! PLUS ULTRA!" Izuku panted as he leaped ecstatically towards the U.A. logo, but as he got too close, he was stopped as he was slapped by a giant harisen, squishing him against the wall like a bug, "Owww…"</p><p>The narrator "Ha-ha! Not so fast, Eager McBeaver. We haven't even talked about…"</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>
    <span>PERSONAL HYGIENE</span>
  </strong>
</p><p>The sound of a toilet flushing starts off the segment as the scene transitions to Hanta Sero in the restroom, standing in front of a sink.</p><p>"Every student at U.A. must comply with the strict set of personal hygiene guidelines." The narrator said informatively as Hanta turns on the faucet. "Are you ready to prepare for your classes, Mr. Sero?"</p><p>Hanta nodded to the camera as he lathered his hands while the narrator continued his lecture, "A good student washes themselves thoroughly. Be sure to get under those fingernails."</p><p>Hanta complied as he rubs his hands harder, "And don't forget about the knuckles…"</p><p>The Tape Quirk-user scrubbed his hands more aggressively, "And make sure those palms are squeaky clean."</p><p>Hanta grimaced as he added more and more friction to his lathering to the best of his ability until his hands disappeared completely.</p><p>"Now that's thorough!" chuckled the narrator as the next scene cuts to Hanta polishing his shoes. "After making sure your shoes are polished…"</p><p>"Your face is clear of any blemishes or boils…" The narrator added while Hanta applied a facial mask on his face.</p><p>"And your hair is neat and tidy…" The narrator listed as Hanta uses hairspray to stiffen his hair as he combs it down while the dark-haired teen gave a thumbs up. "...you are ready to start the day!"</p><p>"Now let's see how Bakugo prepares for his classes…" said the narrator as one of the restroom stalls opened to reveal Bakugo sitting on the toilet reading a Shonen magazine.</p><p>The spiky-haired boy looks up from his magazine as he is being watched by the camera, "A little bit of frickin' privacy please?!" He shuts the stall door in a fit of rage and went back to his routine.</p><p>"Remember: No student wants to be a Bakugo." forewarned the narrator. "Now that you're clean and hygienic, I bet you're ready to know how to become a hero!"</p><p>"I'M READY!" Izuku yelled as he multiplies into chibi versions of himself. "I'M READY! I'M READY! I'M READY!"</p><p>Multiple harisens splattered the chibi Dekus as they were getting too excited for their own good, "Woah there! We still have a few more topics to cover first."</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>
    <span>YOUR CLASSROOM</span>
  </strong>
</p><p>"It's your duty to keep your homeroom tidy and free of droppings," The narrator continued as Tenya Iida is shown vacuuming the teacher's desk in a new scene. "But a clean classroom is only part of the job."</p><p>A thought bubble pops up in Iida's head as he imagined stapled paper, "To make the vision in your head a reality, you'll need supplies, and a good student keeps their supplies well-organized."</p><p>Iida then opens his desk and pulls out a filing cabinet; within the bottom drawer were folders organized according to the name of each individual tool, and as the blue-haired student searches through the folders, he opens one that is labeled 'Stapler' and takes out a stapler. "Very nice, Mr. Iida, not a pencil out of place! Now let's see how Bakugo keeps his desk."</p><p>Iida looks over to see Bakugo slouched over in his seat as he slept on his desk; he stirs a little bit as he wakes up, "Huh, wha-D'AHH!" The explosive boy falls over as a loose bolt in his desk causes him to hit the floor hard.</p><p>"Stupid piece of crap desk!" shouted Bakugo as he kicked and punched the faulty desk all while venting his aggression by throwing all sorts of curse words and expletives.</p><p>"Don't worry, Bakugo, Mr. Iida will cover for you," assured the narrator as the next scene cuts to Izuku again. "Now that you're situated into your homeroom, perhaps you think you're ready to train as a Pro Hero."</p><p>The green-haired boy suddenly started to bark like a dog as he runs around on all fours as he expressed his excitement.</p><p>"Calm down, fido!" The narrator laughed as he tossed a bone to Izuku; the boy grabbed it with his teeth and gnawed on it. "There's plenty of time left. We have to make sure you're ready for the psychological aspect of the job…"</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>
    <span>INTERFACING WITH YOUR TEACHER</span>
  </strong>
</p><p>The scene transitions to Momo Yaoyorozu, who approached Aizawa at his desk as the teacher was grading papers; the dark-haired girl cleared her throat, "Aizawa-sensei, may I have extra credit?"</p><p>"No." Aizawa replied swiftly and halfheartedly.</p><p>"Good job, Miss Yaoyorozu!" The narrator congratulated the girl, who smiled in reply.</p><p>Izuku then suddenly dashes up to the camera with severe anticipation, which surprises Momo enough to scare her, "CAN I LEARN HOW TO BE A HERO NOW-"</p><p>"Now we go from the classroom to the cafeteria, where we'll examine the most important aspect of the student body: Social Interaction," The narrator interjected as the scene transitions to the lunch room where the students are picking up their food through the lunchline. "Or as it is normally called, 'Bonding with your classmates.'"</p><p>"Who said that?! Are you a ghost?!" shouted a visibly shaken Eijiro Kirishima, who was in the lunchline and was subsequently followed by Bakugo, as he overheard the narrator's voiceover.</p><p>"Like precious blood in an animal, good communication and healthy relationships with your peers is what makes the U.A. school community strong and alive." The narrator explained.</p><p>"Bakugo! The ceiling's talking to me!" Kirishima said fearfully to his friend.</p><p>"Are you going to get something to eat or just make friends with the paneling," frowned Bakugo.</p><p>"I'll think I'm gonna get… uhhh…" Kirishima zoned out as he concentrated on choosing from the school's lunch menu; the red-haired drifted off to sleep as he got bored from thinking.</p><p>Bakugo snapped his fingers to wake Kirishima, "Hey, Shitty Hair, go be stupid somewhere else!"</p><p>"Ah-ah-ah, Bakugo, remember what Principal Nezu says…" chastised the narrator.</p><p>A cutout of Nezu appears along with a speech bubble as he is quoted, "'I'm the one who could be a dog, a mouse, or a bear, but more importantly… I'm the principal!'"</p><p>"The ceiling's right, Bakugo, you're not being a good classmate." absconded Kirishima.</p><p>Bakugo scoffed, "Fine, take your damn time or whatever…"</p><p>"Let's see I'll have an… uhhhhhh…" Kirishima drones to himself as Bakugo growled impatiently.</p><p>"We'll check up on these two later," The narrator said as he guided the audience. "Right now, it's important that we discuss an…"</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>
    <span>EMERGENCY SITUATION</span>
  </strong>
</p><p>The next scene shows Shoto Todoroki and Denki Kaminari having lunch in the cafeteria as they nonchalantly ate their food.</p><p>"Like Superman and his Kryptonian abilities, many consider having a Quirk to be a gift. And as with every gift, there's a villain ready to exploit it. So it's up to you to be the watchful eyes of…" The narrator forewarned as Dabi and Toga Himiko snatches Shoto into a burlap bag; a giant robot spider walker appeared with Tomura Shigaraki piloting the machine with leather reins as the other two villains jumped onto the robot with their captive. "What's this?! It's the evil crime syndicate, The League of Villains!"</p><p>"Eat my ass, All Might! Soon your precious students will rebel against your fragile Hero Society as we will induct them to join our cause!" proclaimed Tomura as he drove the robot walker.</p><p>"Was this slow robot walker the best getaway vehicle you could come up with?" Dabi asked condescendingly.</p><p>"Yeah, we could've just gotten Kurogiri to teleport us out of here," Toga surmised.</p><p>"Shut up! I can do what I want!" snapped Tomura.</p><p>"They're kidnapping Mr. Todoroki! What are you going to do, Mr. Kaminari?" exclaimed the narrator as he reached out to a shocked Kaminari, who started screaming as the latter ran around the cafeteria.</p><p>All Might then appears out of nowhere as he casually walked up to the slow robot walker; Tomura glared at the Pro Hero, "You'll never catch us, All Might! Not after I switch into maximum overdrive! Hi-Ya!" Tomura cried as he whipped the robot to make it walk faster, but just barely.</p><p>The #1 Pro Hero simply clutched one of the four legs of the machine, making it stop like it was regular toy. Tomura gave a disappointed dour, as he knew he and his fellow villains failed, "I knew I should've gotten the turbo…"</p><p>"Oh, you think?" Toga and Dabi both replied sarcastically.</p><p>All Might grabs the burlap sack that contained Shoto and freed him; Kaminari, meanwhile was still panicking and was knocking over tables and chairs in the cafeteria.</p><p>"Hear me, All Might! You'll take the chance at killing you from me when you pry it from my cold, dead…" Tomura ranted, but never completed his villainous statement as he, his cohorts, and his giant robot walker were kicked out of the building by the #1 Hero; his screaming trailed off as the machine went flying along with the three villains.</p><p>"Are you all right, Young Todoroki?" All Might asked the Half-Hot, Half-Cold teen as the latter simply nodded and grunted before nibbling on his sandwich.</p><p>"And so, another emergency is avoided, thanks to Mr. Kaminari," The narrator announced as the Electric boy was still screaming and running around like a maniac; the scene immediately cuts back to Bakugo in the lunchline with Kirishima still droning. "Let's check in on Bakugo again…"</p><p>Bakugo was even more annoyed than previously, which prompted the narrator to help the poor, angry teen out, "Psst, Bakugo."</p><p>"What now?" Bakugo growled as he retorted in a low voice.</p><p>"Just remember: HECK." The narrator hinted as Bakugo exasperated while he donned a contrived smile.</p><p>"Hey, Kirishima, if I could make a suggestion, why don't you just get a bento box?" Bakugo suggested.</p><p>"Great idea, Bakugo! Remind me to give you some credited kudos!" Kirishima replied happily as he turned to Lunch Rush, the chef Pro Hero who ran the cafeteria. "One bento box, please!"</p><p>"Frickin' finally!" Bakugo said lowly as he sighed with relief.</p><p>"Would you care for a dessert?" Lunch Rush said with an upbeat attitude as he offered a cookie to Kirishima.</p><p>"NO-!" exclaimed Bakugo.</p><p>"Uhhhh…" Kirishima contemplated as a highly impatient Bakugo began to bang his head against his food tray in frustration.</p><p>"Hang in there, Bakugo, it's all part of the process," assured the narrator as the next scene cuts to a U.A. student manual. "Now that you've covered all the basics, it's time for the moment you've been waiting for!"</p><p>The U.A. logo began to slowly zoom in towards the camera in a dramatic presentation while the narrator made an exciting acapella instrumental, "Da-da-da-da-da-da-daa! Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-daa! Da-da-da-da-da-da-daa! Da-da-da-la-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-daa! Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-daa… TSSSHH! Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-daa-da-da a-da-DAA! Ti-ta-ti-ti-ta-ti-ti-ta-ta-ta- la-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-da-la-ba-ba-ba-ba-da-la-ba-ba-BAA! Ti-ta-ti-li-ta-ti-li-ti-TAA! Ti-ta-ti-li…" The narrator pauses to take a breath before resuming, "Ti-ta-ti-li-ta-ti-li-ta-ti-li-ta-ti-li-ta-ti-li-ti-ta-ti-ti- ta-ti-ti-TAAAAA! Preparing the U.A. briefing!"</p><p>The scene cuts to Izuku in his dorm room, bowing to an All Might body pillow as the narrator delivered the final conclusion, "At the center of every tragic situation is the Hero, who keeps the law and order of the modern world alive and thriving. For U.A. Academy, this is the young hero of Tomorrow." Izuku hugs and nuzzles against the body pillow.</p><p>"And now you, the humble high school student of the educational system," The narrator spieled to the green-haired boy, who glances towards the camera. "The all too necessary human resource that keeps society's stability afloat will earn sacred and dark secrets of to utilize with your very hands…"</p><p>Izuku gasped with anticipation as he mimicked every following adjective with his body language, "...the sumptuous, lip moistening, spine tingling, heart stopping pleasure center that is becoming a superhero! Are you ready?"</p><p>Izuku nodded violently as he was eagerly waiting for his answer; the narrator retorts, "Are you sure?"</p><p>"YES! I AM BEYOND READY, SIR!" Izuku shouted ecstatically.</p><p>"Okay! Here's how you become a hero-"</p><p>
  <strong>[DISC UNREADABLE]</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>[RETURNING TO MAIN MENU]</strong>
</p>
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